to you

I know you think me not so simple. Piano is being played in the background at the very moment
I write. I say that so you will understand my surroundings. Sunday mornings at my house are
my favorite. My mom is always practicing for church in her cute little robe, while dad is cooking
in flannel. Sunday mornings at my house exemplify what it is I am waiting for.


All I want is to get up and walk, come back to the house and sit on the porch drinking a cup a
coffee. I'd like to wake up at 5 in the morning, every day, to get a head start on the world. As I
am drinking my coffee I want to do a morning devotional. All this would be done by 7, and I
would then hop in the shower and get ready for the day. My days would consist of helping and
preparing events at church, as well as take sunny d's to my kid's soccer game. I'd be a regular at
the coffee shop where I would get in passing conversation with all the locals. During the summer
me and mine would run our youth camp. Oh, man.

What do I have though?
I have struggles to be the woman God desires me to be. I don't read my Bible as often as I
should. I have a huge problem with time management. My hair is always flying in 15 directions. I
lose 10 things a day. I never see my parents. Sometimes I hang out with people who I don't
influence in the right way enough. I'm usually tired and have 15 missed calls or texts. My room
makes it look like I live in a war zone. I don't know what to do about college. I can't find the time
to exercise. I don't study. I don't do enough homework.

God still loves me? My friends? Maybe I am an excellent actress. I am a simple, simple person. I
just can't figure out how to do everything. I don't even know how to speak.

Operation Christmas Child

i am a simple, simple person.

Silent knight, holy knight.

all is calm, all is bright


Amy forced the key into the ignition. The world's icy breath blew through the air vents on high. Hurry warmth, hurry. She waved to the friends she was leaving in the parking lot. She assumed they didn't see her drive away. "And now back to 40 minutes of your favorite Christmas hits on your #1 Holiday music station.." Amy wished the road would move faster beneath her tires. Home wasn't close enough today. She didn't think she could take being in the car with herself for another half hour drive. If only she could stop herself from thinking, worrying, wondering. As her car came to a halt at the red light she rolled her neck around then glanced in the rear view mirror. Definitely going to bed early again tonight. Amy pulled in the garage and sat. Simply, sat.

if you need smokes.. i'm here for you.

just a note,

today was magnificent.
(minus calculus)
i'm overwhelmed with love and friendship.
everyone did way too much.
i can't believe i'm 18.

Ever thankful,
God bless you all.

"X" marks the spot.

It's evening. Another night with coffee, the buzz of my cell phone, and a to-do list begins. Really, it's always the same on these school nights. My mind laughs at everything I "have" to do, knowing that I probably won't do it. As a friend puts it, "I have the best intentions, the act just doesn't follow." The next morning I race to finish all my assignments, killing NOT two, but one bird at a time. Thinking back to middle school, wow, awhile ago, I remember so clearly my excellence. The must-have-an-A mentalitly I was sure would carry me through to the end. Now, it's sit, think, relax, worry, laugh, eat, sleep, hurry. Always. I was thinking about college tonight. Anna and I went to church, chick-fil-a for a second time, and departed at the stop light to go towards our own neck of the woods. The whole way home I actually thought about the pros of college. I'm really excited for a "student center." The idea sounds incredibly promising. I know here, at my house, I'm always wanting a place to go that isn't my room, or the living room. I feel like it is going to be a really good balance. an unbalancing act gone right. Life is moving too fast for my comfort and this month is just so much fun, I can't hardly stand it. Do I sound 80 or what? To conclude I feel it is only appropriate to say, tomorrow I'm going to _______.