"Nothing is better than something..

because I'm waiting for the real thing."

I remember yearning for something, anything.
I can smell the cologne of naivety.
My body reminisces those dark nights.
The words that used to coax me into surrender,
how bittersweet as they resound in my head.
The now faded letters and twenty-five cent rings,
that once cluttered my desk,
that's right.. cluttered my desk,
are replaced with lighthouses of encouragement.
"You seemed happier today"
Those were the words I was waiting to hear.
Finally.. it was noticed.
"I feel like, the girl I was a few seasons ago, again, finally."
At one time, that seemed a feat too hard.

What caused the change?
When did it happen?
Where am I going?


Whit has Josh. Kate has Corey. Kaitlen has Lloyd. Lee has Darren. Courtney has Deaton. Liv has Thomas. Caylea has Brandon. Julie has Ethan. Anna has Jeff. I have a call to be patient. And I can be okay with that.

Thank God. Lesson learned. Heartache over. Let me run where I want to run.

like a smoker's first cigarette in the morning..

There are some things you just don't mess with.

reggae and a movie date.

I can't pretend to be something I'm not.
I don't know if anyone knows my hearts true beat.
It feels very alone sometimes.
I do not want sympathy cards.
I am so in love with my God.
I find my peace in Him.
I can picture myself at the bottom of a mountain right now,
staring up at the majesty it commands.

The river would sound so peaceful tonight;
but I can deal with pitter-patter on the window sill..
the sound of cars on wet pavement..


I'd like a house, with a car, and a family of my own.
I'd like a tent, with stars, and crickets.
I'd like a boardgame, with Ginger, and laughter.
I'd like a 5-star hotel, pillow mints, and a book.
I'd like a foreign country, strangers, and a view.
I'd like the coast, the wind, and birds to chirp me a melody.




You could say I'm searching.

i love randolph county, and mashed potatoes.

I did the correct thing tonight.
a first.